Nonprofit Leaders Answer: What is the Best Way to Handle Conflicts or Disagreements on a Nonprofit Board?

Build Conflict Skills Early and Refocus on Mission

First of all, conflict management should be part of every board’s professional development, in the same way we’d approach strategic planning or financial literacy. We train our board on Nonviolent Communication (NVC) strategies, so that those skills are in place even before disagreements arise.

From that foundation, it’s important to treat your board like the adults they are (although they may need to be reminded of that). The executive director or board chair shouldn’t do too much hand-holding, and instead allow board members to practice listening, responding, and collaborating on conflict resolution.

Finally, always bring everything back to the mission. Remind everyone why they’re there — this amazing organization they all love, even if they differ in the ways to best support that organization.

— Erik Greenfrost from San Francisco Senior and Disability Action.

Keep Debates Grounded in Impact and Values

Managing board conflict really comes down to remembering that passion and friction go hand-in-hand when people care deeply about a mission. In my experience, the best way to handle disagreements is to immediately pivot the conversation back to the community we serve.

When a debate starts getting tense or looping in circles, I find it incredibly grounding to stop and ask, “How does this specific choice impact the families we are serving this month?”

Moving the focus away from personal opinions and putting it back on our core values instantly lowers the temperature in the room.

It also helps immensely to establish a clear code of conduct during your annual board orientation, long before any arguments actually happen. We explicitly agree to critique ideas rather than people, and we commit to supporting the final decision as a united front once the vote is cast.

If a disagreement is purely strategic, we actually encourage it because healthy debate leads to better risk management. But if it starts turning personal, our board chair steps in to handle it offline through a private, one-on-one conversation.

At the end of the day, you can’t be afraid of a little tension. I always try to close out our tougher meetings by having everyone share a quick story about a recent win in our outreach programs.

It is a simple, human way to remind everyone that, even when we disagree on the exact roadmap, we are all ultimately trying to get to the exact same destination.

— Elena Vance from Community Youth Alliance

Address Issues Early with Clarity and Understanding

Conflict must be handled by a balance of clearheadedness, understanding each side’s perspective, and context is required/a must. And not letting issues fester.

— JJ Vancura from Junior League of Baltimore

Follow Policy, Involve HR, and Respond with Facts

First, refer to agency bylaws, review the code of conduct, and confidentiality policies to ensure you remain in compliance.

Include HR and the personnel committee chair if needed, and possibly seek an external person.

At the end, debrief with the executive committee.

Remember, being an active listener and nonjudgemental are key. Don’t respond on emotion, respond on facts.

— Melinda Daniels from Community Action of Orleans and Genesee Inc.

Invest in Professional Board Training

Mandatory annual board training by a training professional who specializes nonprofits — it’s worth the money, even for small nonprofits!

The trainer can help clarify roles and can design training that is tailored to your nonprofit. Seek out trainers through organizations that support nonprofits in your state, for example, the Center for Nonprofit Excellence in Virginia.

— Jeanne Comeau from LOWLINC

Name Conflict Types and Encourage Honest Dialogue

Board conflicts usually get dangerous when everyone pretends it isn’t happening.

Nonprofit boards can survive strong disagreement. What they don’t survive well is side conversations, vague resentment, or a board chair who lets tension sit because they don’t want to “make it awkward.”

The best approach is to slow the conversation down and name what kind of conflict it is.

Are we disagreeing about mission? Money? Staff roles? The ED’s authority? A board member overstepping? Those are different problems, and they need different responses.

I also think boards need to get more comfortable saying, “We may not all agree, but we do need to be clear about how this decision gets made.” Healthy conflict needs a chair who can keep people honest without shaming anyone.

It also needs board members who understand that disagreement is not betrayal. The goal isn’t a board where everyone is nice. It’s a board where people can tell the truth early enough that the organization doesn’t pay for the silence later.

— Suzanne Guinn from AcademySTAY

Address Tension Directly and Mediate if Needed

Notice when there is tension within a board meeting. Address it sensitively at the time.

If the cause is not obvious, spend one-on-one time with the two people involved and, if necessary, sit them down with a third party and the direction to “work it out.”

— Adrienne Lauby from SAVS (Sonoma Applied Villages Services)

Center Decisions on Mission and Shared Solutions

Understanding where each person is coming from; comparing the discussion to the mission (“what works best for the organization?”; and asking “how do we make this work?“

— Denise Lanza from Morris Park Alliance

Reconnect Board Members to Shared Purpose

An effective reset in times of conflict is to start a board meeting by going around the table and having everyone say why they wanted to join this board and support this mission. This exercise reminds everyone that they are on the same team and share the same goals.

It is also a reminder that the board works as a whole and the organization’s needs come first before individual opinions and egos.

— Kim Haines from Harrisonburg Redevelopment & Housing Authority